A Shreveport man, Donald Gumpsby age 27, was admitted into Brentwood Hospital in Shreveport La. late Friday night for an extreme case of chafed buttocks. He reportedly worked a double on Friday straight through and with no powder. Co-workers say “he likes to live on the wild side”. Witnesses said he was bleeding right through his white server uniform. “At first I thought a ketchup bottle exploded”, says Lillian Mitchell of New Orleans. “Next thing I know he was laying on the floor in the fetal position crying for his momma. That’s when I said Philip call 911, this man needs some help”. Shortly after the call to 911, the paramedics showed up. They tried to stop the bleeding while still at the restaurant. In the process they had to cut away his trousers and apply pressure. Several guests of the small dinner took the opportunity to complain about the atmosphere to the manager Earl Lewis, 47, of Bossier City. When we asked Mr. Lewis about it he got quite emotional. As tears flowed down his face he said, “I just can’t believe how low some people will stoop to get a free meal, what about Don, he is a quart low, has nurses rubbing cream on his back side right this very moment and all these people can think about is their chicken fried steak and fried okra. It just makes me sick. Who knows how long it will be before he can work a double again. I might need to take some time off, says Earl, and slip down to Mobil for a few weeks for some old fashioned carp fishing”. What will come of this tragic episode? Your guess is as good as ours. As always, 86BadTips is on the scene when funny things happen. We report, you laugh.

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